being a parent is hard in ways that you never even knew existed before you became one. in this moment, parenting feels very hard and overwhelming.
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of course, parenting is also rewarding and lovely and i wouldn't trade my amazing girls for all of the fabric in the world; i am proud of who they are and i love watching them grow into themselves. even as i am finding my way through the hard stuff, i know how lucky i am to have the amazing girls that i do.
it was over a year ago that i shared here about Kahlin's anxiety, and a lot has happened since then. at the end of last school year, we found a really fabulous therapist, Kahlin was diagnosed with OCD, and we went through a combination of parent education, cognitive therapy, and exposure therapy. honestly, i was shocked at how quickly her symptoms came under control. Kahlin worked really hard, and i feel like we absolutely have the tools we need to help her manage her anxiety.
however, Kahlin's behavior became harder to manage. she has always been impulsive, restless, very active, and had trouble focusing... all of this just became more pronounced as we gained control of her anxiety. it was hard to watch, and frustrating. we were working so hard, and things seemed to be getting worse.
from the beginning of therapy, we knew there was a chance that some form of ADHD might be at play, but wanted to look at the other possible avenues first. which brings us to now... yesterday, Nick and I met with the therapist to go over the results of the ADHD assessment she put together with feedback from her experiences, our observations, and information from Kahlin's teachers. (side-note: her teachers have been amazing, and we are so grateful for their support!)
overall, Kahlin meets criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD, combined type (both inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive), and her symptoms are severe enough to be causing significant impairment at both school and home. because of the degree to which this is impacting her, and with consideration for all that we already do, the therapist has recommended that we talk to our pediatrician about medication options.
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mostly the question i've gotten about this is, "how do you feel about that?" honestly, i feel relieved. i feel exhausted, and i feel like we have turned our lives upside down to try to make things easier for Kahlin and nothing has worked... i feel hopeful that this will help. but i also feel nervous. i feel nervous about her trying out medication, and i feel nervous about telling people about it. i feel nervous about helping her manage something i don't really understand.
and it makes me feel vulnerable to share about this, but i will. i will share because i think it is important to give a voice to all of the parents who are exhausted and terrified and worried and aren't sure of how to best help their kids. and i will share because it's not all perfect arts and crafts projects and smiling girls in handmade clothes around here. there is crying, and there are parents not sure of what to do, and there are children who need us to sit next to them for an hour to answer a few math problems at homework time.
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yes, it is exhausting and terrifying, this parenting gig. but, most of all... it makes me amazed.
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it was over a year ago that i shared here about Kahlin's anxiety, and a lot has happened since then. at the end of last school year, we found a really fabulous therapist, Kahlin was diagnosed with OCD, and we went through a combination of parent education, cognitive therapy, and exposure therapy. honestly, i was shocked at how quickly her symptoms came under control. Kahlin worked really hard, and i feel like we absolutely have the tools we need to help her manage her anxiety.
however, Kahlin's behavior became harder to manage. she has always been impulsive, restless, very active, and had trouble focusing... all of this just became more pronounced as we gained control of her anxiety. it was hard to watch, and frustrating. we were working so hard, and things seemed to be getting worse.
from the beginning of therapy, we knew there was a chance that some form of ADHD might be at play, but wanted to look at the other possible avenues first. which brings us to now... yesterday, Nick and I met with the therapist to go over the results of the ADHD assessment she put together with feedback from her experiences, our observations, and information from Kahlin's teachers. (side-note: her teachers have been amazing, and we are so grateful for their support!)
overall, Kahlin meets criteria for a diagnosis of ADHD, combined type (both inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive), and her symptoms are severe enough to be causing significant impairment at both school and home. because of the degree to which this is impacting her, and with consideration for all that we already do, the therapist has recommended that we talk to our pediatrician about medication options.
and it makes me feel vulnerable to share about this, but i will. i will share because i think it is important to give a voice to all of the parents who are exhausted and terrified and worried and aren't sure of how to best help their kids. and i will share because it's not all perfect arts and crafts projects and smiling girls in handmade clothes around here. there is crying, and there are parents not sure of what to do, and there are children who need us to sit next to them for an hour to answer a few math problems at homework time.
yes, it is exhausting and terrifying, this parenting gig. but, most of all... it makes me amazed.
